We've all known this for a long time now, right?
Fatboy Slim, however, being the musical genius that he is, apparently felt that some people might not be clear on the issue.Yeah, I know none of this is relatedSo he has devoted an entire music video to proving the syllogism:
Given:
White men can't dance
And :
Christopher Walken can't dance
We can conclude:
Christopher Walken is white!
Now, unlike certain other well-known performers, Christopher Walken has always been white, at least as far back as I remember. So basically, I am being subjected to several minutes of him flitting about and pelvic thrusting in some kind of Bob Fosse mockery through an empty hotel lobby for absolutely no reason at all. At one point he hops up on a table, looking like a middle-aged Judd Nelson doing the Molly Ringwald Breakfast Club jig. I'm just slightly disturbed by it, particularly because I can't stop watching. I recognize the video the moment it comes on, and watch the entire thing in slack-jawed horror, kind of like with a car wreck. Except without the severed limbs. Just one of the more bizarre celebrity appearances in recent memory, right up there with Jerry Springer in a leather harness flashing nipples during spring break.